Rachana Dubey (BOMBAY TIMES; February 13, 2019)

Little did Amrita Rao know that co-hosting a show with a radio jockey would change her life. It was in 2010 that she met RJ Anmol, who anchored a retro-based Bollywood show on radio. With time, they became friends and gradually, their relationship took a serious turn. He proposed to her — first on air and then, in his car near Juhu beach. The actress had always wanted her first relationship to last forever, and her wish was granted, when, after dating for about six years, the couple got married in May 2016. For the first time, Amrita, who recently returned to the big screen with Thackeray, decided to take BT through her romantic journey. Excerpts:

As an artiste, you never allowed people into your private space. Be it your relationship or your marriage, you have never spoken about where and how it all began...
I am a huge retro fan, and I had proposed that Anmol and I do a Kishore Kumar show together. That’s when we first met and soon, we realised that we had a common love for old songs. It wasn’t love at first sight for us, but that evening, the first chord was struck. Gradually, we became friends. His positive aura attracted me, but I didn’t realise it for a very long time. We shared a rare comfort with each other. Both of us loved exploring the old-world charm of Mumbai, going on drives and walking in the quaint bylanes near Flora Fountain.

It’s said that marriage changes the course of a relationship. From being a girlfriend to being a wife, the transition must have been drastic...
Luckily, our temperament and likes are very similar. We are naturally compatible, so nothing has changed between us. It started off with us being friends and that is intact even today. When we started living with each other, he had told me that it would be different, and we have to ensure that we never become disrespectful of each other or take each other for granted. Once a mirror is cracked, you can’t mend it, and we didn’t want that. That’s what worked in our favour; we’re always on the same page. We’ve also never let our professional and personal lives cross paths. Keeping them apart makes it all peaceful and happy.

Must say, an actress falling in love with an RJ is indeed an interesting story, and he even proposed to you on air. Pretty much a scene out of a movie, isn’t it?
Yes, he did. He first texted me, saying that I shouldn’t miss the next track on his show. It was my favourite song — Gum hai kisike pyaar mein (Rampur Ka Lakshman) — following which he proposed. I was shocked and when I called him back, we both laughed over it. But deep down, he had expressed what he felt, in the most bold and beautiful manner. In my head, even at that time, he was still my friend who I loved hanging out with. Eventually, he proposed to me again, near Juhu beach. This time, he said, ‘I think we must give this a chance, maybe you are not recognising things.’ I told him, ‘This is the first time I getting into any relationship and it will be serious from this point onwards.’ We’ve never looked back after that. He’s the first and the only man I committed to in a relationship. I had always wished for it to be this way, because I was not the kind of person who would try and test relationships with different people. For me, it was always going to be one relationship for eternity. We spent a lot of time getting to know each other and our families. Gradually, it all came together. My parents loved him in the first 10 minutes of meeting him. His mother once told me, ‘Beta, when we saw Vivah, I had told Anmol, bahu ho to aisi ho. I had never thought ki bahu wohi hogi.’ And then, about six years later, we got married.

Like most Indian couples, are you also facing questions about expanding your family?
Not yet because so far, a lot of people didn’t even know that I was married. Now, the questions may start popping. I have never done something because of any pressure. Anmol is very fond of kids and wants to have a kid, too. We haven’t really made any plans in that direction, yet.

You decided to step out of limelight when you were doing well, professionally. Was there ever a point when you felt that you could have steered the course of your career differently?
Nope! Things are perfect the way they are. Yes, I could have done a lot of films had I compromised on my comfort. I was never comfortable getting intimate on screen or kissing. I could have pinched myself and done it, but I chose to sit back and say ‘no’. Marrying someone not from the industry really helped. We successfully kept everything away from public glare and there couldn’t have been a better time for us to take the plunge. Working in this industry has a lot of pressures, especially for outsiders. Second chances are rare and people pull you down at the first opportunity. I thank God that I have someone, who gives me a new perspective on everything and absorb only the positives in every circumstance.