Sunayana Suresh (BOMBAY TIMES; November 25, 2020)

Actress and musician Shruti Haasan has spent almost all of 2020 alone in her Mumbai home. Since the unlock process began, she released a single, Edge, and has also nosedived into multiple film projects. She gets reflective as she talks about poetry, music and films. Excerpts...

You’ve spent a major part of 2020 alone, giving you time to introspect. How are you looking at 2021?
I want to really look ahead now. I have always been kind of a loner. To be with myself for all these months with my creative juices has been amazing. I take this energy of introspection, joy and love for myself into 2021 with more music, movies and energy. It has been a tough time for everybody and I want to take forward the lessons learnt this year.

How has 2020 worked out for the poet in you?
I’ve been writing poetry for years. It is that thing between me and my dad (Kamal Haasan) — a special dad-daughter thing. He’s the one who encouraged me to write poetry. So, all of my lyrics somewhere are born out of my poetry. I like to speak poetically in life as well, because the things we say are so boring. Edge, for me, was that shift. I felt like I was in this beautiful black box in my head that blocked everything out and Edge was born out of that. Everything is so safe and calm, but with the pandemic I realised we’re not. Edge was born from me being unafraid to go to that place — to go to the edge of pain, of happiness and of feeling any kind of energy. I think a lot of people resonated with the love part of it, because if you’ve loved right, you have gone there.

What’s next? Another single or an album?
I am like a singles person now, because of the attention span of human beings. But, in my heart, I am a concept album person. Side A and Side B, with B having all the good bits. I will hopefully do a concept album someday.

Did you get comfortable with the idea of collaborating, yet working alone and remotely?
I love working in the studio with people and bouncing off of energies and ideas. I miss that and an online video call cannot substitute that. To just be with musicians in a room is my happy space. I am very old school like that.

After spending so many days in your black box, what was it like to be on a set?
I am all about energies and vibes. Even when people aren’t saying anything, I get rainbows and sunshines if I feel it right. For all those months by myself, I had created this imaginary cave of amethyst and good vibes. The fear when I stepped out was to deflect bad juju and be receptive in a positive way. It was a lot for my auric senses when I first got back on the set. But it was amazing. It just jolted me back to life. For someone petrified of heights, I was standing on a ledge on the first day of shoot after lockdown, with fake rain and a giant wind fan, but I was back at work.

You’re doing many projects now, after that self-imposed break. Was this conscious?
I am glad I took that break in between as I have come out more myself than I have ever intended to with my music and choice of roles. Now, even if I do a small role, I know people are resonating with it as I am resonating with my own frequency. 2020 was supposed to be that year of me going all guns blazing as far as work went. Now, everyone is saying 2021, but I am not waiting, I got back immediately.

Do you ever feel disarmed on a set shooting without a mask, while others have theirs on?
There are people who believe that Coronavirus doesn’t exist. There are others who believe it is like a cold. And there is the other side, where people have lost family members. It all happens so quickly. It is a bit crazy to be in that environment. We are going to continue in this pandemic for a while. Hopefully, this gives grace and humility to people about the fact that your ego doesn’t control the universe. We are small and we have to be careful.