Man of the moment Ayushmann Khurrana on being a young dad, life lessons and wife Tahira’s battle with cancer
Deebashree Mohanty (TIMES LIFE; December 9, 2018)

Six years in the industry and quite a few hits to your name... have you arrived?
It’s great to be in that zone where people expect something unique out of you every single time. I am a case study which proves that good scripts need good actors. I am glad that my choices have worked out. It’s a happy feeling that the kind of cinema I endorse has many takers. And I’m over the top that I broke into the 100 cr. club.

How much pressure is there to choose the right script and hope it’ll work?
Earlier, there wasn’t much to choose from. I found nothing exciting for two years after Vicky Donor. Suddenly, with Dum Laga Ke Haisha, I set the ball rolling again. Nowadays, I feel script writers have become uninhibited. The kind of scripts that I am reading are truly unique. I know it is difficult to get a wonderful story/character every single time but we are living in a country where there is no dearth of taboo subjects.

Have you seen any changes in yourself over the years?
I have become wiser for sure. And I am far more confident with my choices. I was very indecisive and was open to 10 opinions from everyone about everything. I had a very “safe” mindset, which was wrong. I have realised that nothing is safe, especially in this industry. Now, I have got the basics right. I go with the best script and then work backwards. I have learnt that the biggest asset of any film is the script.

Do you have a set goal in terms of what you aspire to be in the industry?
My aim is to be a good content creator. I think the future of superstars is to be good content creators more than anything else. It is important to get out of the self-obsession mode.

Your wife Tahira was detected with breast cancer... How are you dealing with this sudden turn of events?
Times like this just show that life is a great leveller. I am on a professional high right now. In my personal space though, we are dealing with my wife’s cancer. We have understood that no one’s life is perfect. Every life has a void and we need to acknowledge that with all positivity. That is what we are doing right now. I am glad that Tahira has taken it all very well. As we speak, she is giving a lecture on cancer in Amritsar. She just had her fourth chemotherapy, but for her life goes on. Her doctors are amazed with the kind of positivity that Tahira has shown – taking flights, giving lectures. Chemo makes you weak, but my wife’s spirit is undeterred.

What about you? This must have taken a toll on you mentally...
This experience has made me immune to both happiness and sadness. It has given me a Zen perspective on life – I don’t become ecstatic, nor do I feel low.

Both of you are strong-minded people. How do the dynamics work in your relationship?
We are like any other couple who have had their share of ups and downs. We have fought, made love and moved on, had our mood swings… but I am glad that most of the times we are on the same page. We have similar sensibilities, which also makes our relationship tick. She gives me a lot of space, I give her a lot of space – in the end it all works out. We are the poster couple of SRK’s one-liner in Kuch Kuch Hota Hai: ‘Pyaar dosti hai’. From our geeky tuition days to today, Tahira and I are best buddies first.

How has your relationship evolved?
Honestly, we were like kids when Vicky Donor released. Things weren’t perfect. We were trying very hard to make a long distance relationship work (she was in Chandigarh and me in Mumbai). We were having a lot of problems initially. Mostly, because I had very little time for family and she was learning to cope.

Cut to now, we have matured with age and time. As partners, we have accepted the fact that I will be away for shoots and concerts. This is for our better future and we are both okay with it.

How do you bond with your daughter and son, Varushka and Virajveer?
When I am with them, I become them. I was a father at 27, so I have all the energy to run after my kids and play as much as they would want to. That’s the advantage of being a young parent, growing up with your children. I play cricket and chess with my son who is 6. I bought a piano which my son plays much better than me. My daughter, 4, is busy doing all the girly things with her friends.

So, they are your strengths?
Yes, they have taught me a thing or two about parenting. Because they have mood swings, I have learnt to be more patient. When they fight with each other, I learn the value of being patient and diplomatic. My kids, especially my son, gives me ideas on how to tackle problems too.

If there was one thing that you would like to teach your daughter, what would that be?
More than her, I would like to teach my son to be the perfect man. To be chivalrous, to be a gentleman. We need to teach our sons all this rather than teaching our daughters to stay at home or wear appropriate clothes or sit in a proper way. Daughters are doing fine, we need to teach our sons to do more rights than wrongs. If we all do that, the world will be a better place.

Is the #MeToo Movement the need of the hour?
Absolutely. There should be set rules and guidelines on how to behave in the office space. There should also be a moral compass guiding everyone at home. Harassment is not restricted to the office, it can happen at home too. It is imperative to teach boys from a very young age to respect consent. Movements such as these will act as a deterrent to perpetrators who will now think twice before misbehaving. Having said that, I do think both parties should be given equal opportunities to share their accounts.