Ajay Devgn on 20 years of marriage, and why — and how — he hardly ever loses his cool
Raghuvendra Singh (TIMES LIFE; March 22, 2020)

How different is Kajol on the set and at home?
(Smiles) She’s the same person on the set and at home.

How would you describe your equation with Kajol through the years?
We’ve been married for 20 years. With time, your relationship matures. Your understanding of each other grows. Life eases out. She knows exactly what my habits are, what I’m seeking from life, just the way I know about her. We’re happy being with each other and giving space to each other as well. The balance comes with time gradually, which is good for a marriage.

How has Kajol changed through the years?
(Smiles) There’s no drastic change in her. She’s the same person she was. Earlier, people would say that Kajol says it the way it is. She does that even today. The only difference is that she has become more mature. She understands things better. She reacts in a better way.

Is there any particular value that appeals to you, and you want your children to imbibe it?
I spend a lot of time with my children. I want them to be true and honest to themselves. If they’re honest to themselves, they’ll be honest with us. I want them to respect others and themselves. I tell them that every day. That covers everything. If you respect yourself, you carry yourself with dignity. When you respect others, you uphold your culture. That’s the basic foundation.

Yug seems to be interested in photography. His clicks on your social media pages are interesting…
No, nothing like that. He’s way too young. He plays football, does parkour and indulges in photography as well. Like any kid, he enjoys it all. When he grows older, he’ll be able to decide what he wants to do.

What about Nysa?
She’s in the eleventh class. She has a lot of options to choose from. Children should be allowed to pursue what they like. But we do discuss what’s good for them. The final call is theirs. If you study something, you should be able to enjoy the process. If you force something upon children, they will neither enjoy it nor succeed.

In an industry thriving on PR, you don’t seem desperate for attention.
I’m like this only. I believe once you’ve done your job, you should shut up. People have ears, eyes, mouth… They can understand everything. It’s their job to talk, not yours. Touchwood! People meet me with respect. I feel happy about it. You gain nothing by shouting from the rooftops. Whatever you achieve is temporary. And I don’t believe in temporary things. They never last.

Can we get to know the real Ajay Devgn from your social media handle?
(Smiles) You won’t be able to know. I only comment on what needs to be commented upon on social media. But it’s always the truth. For instance, during elections, I urge people to vote. I wish all on Diwali. If a tragedy is disturbing, I write about it. Jo dil se nikalta hai, woh bol deta hoon. At times, there’s pressure to post something... but I don’t give in to that pressure. Sometimes my team asks me to post something because I haven’t in a while. But I don’t do it just for the sake of it. What I have worn today or what colour I like, why should I post about that?

You are known to be a prankster. We never see that side of you on social media?
Yaar, we all have our personal lives. We do masti mazaak with people we’re comfortable with. Recently, on Diwali my entire family was together. So I clicked a picture and shared it spontaneously. But if you have to post something every day then that’s succumbing to pressure. That’s also a kind of promotion. If you post anything, there always will be positive and negative reactions. If I write something genuinely and it invites a negative reaction, I know that I believe in what I wrote. I stick to that.

How do you keep yourself away from negativity?
I don’t pay attention to it. I don’t bother about it. If I read something unsavoury about myself, I don’t pick up the phone and ask my publicist to look into it. Sometimes, he comes and tells me, ‘Sir yeh chhapa hai.’ I say, ‘Yes I read it.’ The topic is over. In real life, I cut off from a negative person. If I’m working with such a person, then I keep it to the point. Na baat karne ki zaroorat hai aur na jhagda karne ki.

Your father, Veeru ji (Devgn), passed away recently. What do you miss about him?
Yaad toh aati hai. Every day, some moment or the other reminds me of him… more so when I go to his room. Few days ago we had a pooja at home. I miss the usual things he did or said. There’s a picture of him in my office. The moment I enter, I see his frame. Dad couldn’t see the new office. It became operational after his demise.

Apparently, you are soon reuniting with Sanjay Leela Bhansali…
It’s too early to talk about it. We’re in talks but let’s see what happens. It’s like asking someone, are you married. No? Okay, how many children do you have? (Laughs) Bhai shaadi toh ho jaane do pehle. Let’s lock that first.

If you had to remake one of your films, which one it would be?
It would be my first film, Phool Aur Kaante (1991). I’ve thought of a new way of presenting it. I will co-produce it with someone. I’m looking for a fresh face for that. The approach will be different but the emotional texture will be retained.