Showing posts with label Sameera Reddy interview. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sameera Reddy interview. Show all posts
I am blessed that my children are growing up close to nature-Sameera Reddy
4:27 PM
Kimberly Colaco (BOMBAY TIMES; June 5, 2026)
When Sameera Reddy arrived in Goa for what was meant to be a 10-day holiday in June 2020, she was looking for a break from Mumbai's relentless pace. She never left. Seven years later, the actress has built a life in Bastora, North Goa, that is intertwined with the rhythms of nature — one where compost replaces garbage, homegrown produce fills the kitchen, and her children learn life lessons from the outdoors rather than screens. For Sameera, making Goa home was never just about moving into a new house. It was about embracing a different way of living.
A Garden That Feeds the Family
Step into her property and you'll find more than just greenery. Mango, chikoo, coconut, bimbli, areca nut, breadfruit and banana trees dot the landscape — many planted by Sameera herself. "We also have our own vegetable garden where we grow spinach, salad leaves and other seasonal produce. A lot of what we eat comes directly from our garden," she says.
Nothing goes to waste. She shares, "The banana flower goes into our bhaji, the stem is used for healthy juices and, of course, the fruit becomes everything from snacks to banana bread. It's all pesticide-free. When the harvest is abundant, our neighbours and friends go home with bunches of bananas." If the family wants a cup of lemongrass tea, they simply walk into the backyard.
"I'm blessed that my children are growing up close to nature. They're eating boiled jackfruit seeds as snacks — that wouldn't happen in a city. If they spot a snake, they know not to panic. They simply move away and respect its space,” she shares.
Learning the Art of Composting
One of the biggest changes Goa brought into Sameera's life was composting. "I knew absolutely nothing about it before moving here," she admits. "Today, all our wet waste is turned into compost and goes back into the soil. No wet waste leaves our home. For me, that's been a huge transformation."
The journey wasn't seamless. There were failed attempts, plenty of reading and hours spent watching tutorials. "We failed a few times when we started. I did a lot of research, watched YouTube videos and kept learning. Eventually, we figured it out," the actress says.
Small Habits, Big Impact
Sustainability, Sameera says, isn't about grand gestures. It's about everyday choices. She adds, "We should try to save water and make use of what we already have around us. We have to be conscious about not wasting resources. My car always has two or three cloth bags. I make sure I don't bring plastic home."
It's All About Sharing and Caring
Of all the lessons Goa has taught her, perhaps the most meaningful is the spirit of community. "The best part about Goa is the way people share. I never experienced this kind of culture in Mumbai. Here, people exchange fruits, vegetables, plants and produce simply because they have enough to share. It's taught me the joy of giving and the beauty of living together," she says.
I have done ridiculous things to stay a certain size-Sameera Reddy
2:36 PM
Natasha Coutinho (BOMBAY TIMES; February 25, 2024)
In the past week, two celebrities — TV presenter Sanjana Ganesan, wife of Jaspreet Bumrah, and actress-comedian Amy Schumer — spoke out against unwarranted comments about their bodies. Sanjana was body-shamed for her weight, while Amy was called 'puffer face' by trolls.
We spoke to actress Sameera Reddy, also known as 'Messy Mama' on Instagram, who has always been vocal about dealing with body shaming. She admits she is the happiest and most confident in her 40s.
‘Risked my mental and physical health to stay a certain size’
Many times, I risked my mental and physical health to maintain a certain size. I did the most ridiculous things, such as trying fad diets and working out endlessly post-shoot. What I did back then has resulted in hormonal imbalances now. The consequences catch up with age, and today I'm saddened by the choices I made. Back then, I didn't feel I had any other option, and in a competitive market, you do what you think is right because you believe it's necessary.
‘Self-scrutiny I gave to myself was worse than the scrutiny I received from others’
As a teenager, I was a chubby girl, feeling different from what I believed 'beautiful' was supposed to be. The definition of being beautiful is something all young girls struggle with, and after becoming an actor, my insecurities multiplied a hundredfold. It reached a point where I experienced self-loathing. The scrutiny I imposed on myself was more severe than the scrutiny I received from others.
‘The world is a harsh space’
I was constantly compared to my sisters, Sushama and Meghna, both supermodels. People would ask me, 'Are they really your sisters?' and 'Are you adopted?' because my sisters were skinny and gorgeous, while I was dark-skinned, plump, wore thick glasses, and was not groomed at all.
‘Social media allowed me to discuss stretch marks, grey hair, hormonal imbalance’
OTT emerged as a game-changing platform, allowing people to showcase their talent rather than focusing on physical appearances. I began discussing topics such as stretch marks, grey hair, hormones, and everything I experienced in the last five years, on social media. Initially, people didn't respond positively, stating that it wasn't what they were there for. I don't blame people because we sell a certain image that people buy and here I was breaking it. Things have changed today and people understand you don't need to look perfect.
I care more about being connected than being sexy-Sameera Reddy
8:59 AM
M Suganth (BOMBAY TIMES; September 16, 2023)
Sameera Reddy speaks to us about body positivity, the content she shares on social media and wanting to get back to acting. Excerpts:
How does it feel to be back in Chennai after almost seven years?
It’s definitely been too long. But I feel very connected to the Tamil audience because I have been on social media. I actually feel more connected now than I was years ago. Earlier, there was a very touch-me-not relationship between stars and the audience. But I feel so happy today that I can sometimes directly talk to them.
You have been away from acting for almost 10 years. Was there any time when you felt like you were missing it?
I’ve been missing it every day, because it’s in my blood. When you have done something from a young age, you do feel that way. I’m actually okay not doing Bollywood, but I feel something amiss when not being part of south films. Even when I started my career in Hindi, being a South Indian, I think I never earned my parents’ complete respect. They were okay with it, but that was it. However, the day I started doing South Indian cinema, it’s been very lucky for me. And I’m very grateful for it. Also, my parents had so much joy and pride about it.
That’s why I felt so good doing films here. Your reels on social media are quite popular. Are they a way of feeding your acting bug?
I think I love writing and directing myself. And for years, I’ve never had that opportunity, because as an actor, you always have to listen to your director or producer. What happened with reels was, I was at home and I had time. And I wanted to express myself and make people smile. So, I started just doing these short format videos. I write, direct, and also shoot these myself. And I enjoy it so much. Because, as an actor, you have 10 people doing things for you. The most amazing thing is that I had never explored this side of me, and I realised that I have so much more to offer. And the response has been incredible, so it has become this vehicle of just enjoying and expressing. That’s why I feel that today, the connection with the audience is much stronger than it was before.
Do you catch up on films?
I do try to find time, though I don’t watch that many. I enjoy K dramas and the OTT stuff. I think films will always be the blockbuster ones, but I think real, hard performances are coming out on OTT, more than than the blockbusters.
Are you still friends with the industry people?
Not really. But I met Suriya recently, when he was shooting in Goa. He’s looking great. My Vettai director, Lingusamy sir, and I spoke recently. I have good relationships with everybody. I also spoke to Priyan sir, because I’m very close to his daughter, Ammu (Kalyani Priyadarshan); she’s doing so well. I also met Gautham in Bombay. Everyone’s question is, ‘When are you going to be back?’ I feel like I never left because everybody’s so connected with me.
A DAY IN THE LIFE OF SAMEERA
I live in Goa now. From morning till night, between kids and content creation, I’m just living a beautiful life. Goa is very stunning. And it’s very different from city life. It’s very quiet. Of course, when I start making my reels, it’s very busy and noisy.
‘MY MANAGER FOUGHT WITH ME FOR CHOOSING VAARANAM AAYIRAM’
When Gautham offered me Vaaranam Aayiram, he told me I was the second choice. The actress he had offered it to before me had felt it was too small a role, and had three actresses. But when I heard the story, all I felt was that if you take Meghna out, this movie will not work. For me, that’s the thing for choosing a role. So, I said yes, immediately. Many people told me that I was making a very bad career move. But something in my heart knew that this movie was different. My then manager even fought with me. But I said, ‘I don’t care. I’m in the same movie as Simran, who I love, and Suriya.’ We went against many odds, and look where it ended up! With this film, for the first time, Gautham showed me as a very simple person. If you had seen me in the other movies I’d done before that, I had a lot of makeup on. It was all about sexy, sexy, sexy. I think Vaaranam Aayiram really changed it for me because that was truly who I was and am as a person. I frankly don’t care about being sexy. I care about being connected and loved, and that’s what the film gave me.
ON BEING A BODY POSITIVITY AMBASSADOR
All my life, I have always had very deep body-image issues. I was never a slim girl. I used to not feel great about losing weight for roles. After having kids, I felt that as a woman, I have to speak up. Because many go through this. I felt fearless, and did not want to hide anymore. I felt as a person, if I stand up, and speak for a community of people that feel pressured, maybe we can make it better, no? Many people have asked me, ‘Why do you talk about aging?’, ‘Why do you talk about stretch marks?’ I do it so that people will feel better. Because, there are a lot of people who suffer alone, who feel bad alone. The response has been so powerful, and has me literally in tears. This is what’s more important than a blockbuster film or being loved as a star. Being loved as a human is more important.
A mother needs to be told that “You are allowed to take a step back and say, ‘I am overwhelmed’”-Sameera Reddy
8:21 AM
If young Indian mommies have to name one celebrity mother they follow, most will undoubtedly say Sameera Reddy a.k.a. Messy Mama. The actor-turned-influencer’s hilarious reels on parenting and life in general are super relatable and have won her 1.6 million followers. The 44-year-old mother to Hans, 8, and Nyra, 4, spoke to Neha Bhayana about postpartum depression, sex education and how to create a safe space for kids
Neha Bhayana (THE TIMES OF INDIA; July 30, 2023)
Most moms are trying to be super moms. You, on the other hand, go by the moniker Messy Mama. What made you do that?
I am seriously messy (laughs). Look, I didn’t even set my hair for this interview. Besides, who are these super moms who know everything? I am very honest about the fact that I’m learning on the job. I did this with my career too. I believe that once you put the façade down and just surrender to the fact that we all are a work in progress, the energy changes. I still make mistakes with Nyra and Hans. I sometimes get angry, I shout. My husband just looks at me and mouths ‘calm parenting, conscious parenting’ and I am like ‘oh yeah, sorry!’. We can’t be the way our parents were. Things have changed so much. There is so much chatter on social media; so much perfect parenting. There are moms who claim they don’t give their kids any sugar or screen time. I find that hard to believe. I do everything in balance. I believe whatever is working for me right now is the right way. Motherhood is your journey, and you have to make it yours. I have made it mine and I am so glad. No regrets. Even if I keep making mistakes, I am not going to feel bad because that’s part of the journey.
Women are usually tight-lipped about postpartum depression. What made you speak up?
Just like marriage, motherhood is also glamorized and portrayed to be something magical. When a woman is pregnant, everyone pampers her and then when she gives birth, the whole focus changes to the baby. The mother is expected to keep up with everything, be it breastfeeding, body fat or hormonal changes. I think that’s when postpartum really hits you hard. There are so many women out there who do not even know they are struggling with depression. But such feelings cannot be disregarded. Everybody is fighting his or her own battles. I respect people’s battles and that’s why postpartum needs to be spoken about. A mother needs to be told that “yes, however beautiful and amazing this phase of your life is supposed to be, you are allowed to take a step back and say, ‘I am overwhelmed’.” This luxury has to be allowed. I call this a ‘luxury’ because it is that in most houses. So, give it to your wife, give it to that mother, give it to your daughter-in-law, because she deserves it. I spoke about it because I was shocked. It took me a couple of months after Hans’ birth to even figure out that I was suffering from postpartum depression. What killed me is that when I actually started asking around, most people just shrugged it off saying it is “just the blues”. When I finally understood the condition, I started talking about it openly. When I gave birth to Nyra, I was better prepared. I knew what to do and how to combat it. Being open and truthful to yourself can really set you free.
Are you a conservative mom or a cool one? What if little Nyra wants to get a tattoo when she grows up?
I will be totally chilled. As a couple we are not into tattoos, but I have a mother-in-law whose arms are full of tattoos, so I am used to it. We have to accept our child’s wishes. Our parents were very pucca about how they wanted us to be and what was perceived in society as the correct way to be. As a new-age parent, I will allow my child to do what she wishes but I will educate her about what she is getting into. I will tell her what could go wrong but I will leave the decision to her. Stopping a kid does not work. Besides, I think with children of this generation, I want to be on their side. You have to walk a very fine line where you are that strict parent, but you are also their safe space. That’s necessary in this digital era where children are exposed to so much. I have started telling Hans whatever is happening around us; sometimes, the harsh realities of life. It is hard to do this but I have to because things are moving too fast. We (parents) can’t be naïve; we have to strike that balance.
You recently spoke about the importance of sex education, and about how your parents used to cover your eyes when there was a kissing scene on screen…
Yeah, I think I’m still uncomfortable. I think that happened to all of us from that generation. But I never do that with Hans and Nyra. We usually stick to animated children’s films but if at all there is such a scene on screen, we just don’t react. I don’t want them to think this is so exciting because it is forbidden. The minute you say something is wrong or bad, kids will be like, ‘Whoa, what is this?’. I don’t expose them to something that I wouldn’t want them to be exposed to but at the same time, I’m not going to shield them from everything.
We, parents, can’t turn a blind eye. We have to be aware and alert, especially with cybercrime and so much stuff going around with children. If you’re giving an iPad to your child, especially YouTube, you have to be careful.
I am very open with my kids. I have spoken to Hans about everything under the sun and moon already. Children hear things in school and you want to clear it out for them. It is natural to be curious. I think both my kids are going to have that safe space with me, where it’s our space, it’s our time, where nothing that’s going to be discussed (between us) is going to be discussed with anybody else. I think today’s parents need to have that equation with their child. I will not ‘bro’ them to a point where they walk all over me, but they need that ‘bestie space’ where they can tell me whatever happens and they don’t feel judged.
You are unapologetic about greys, stretch marks and belly rolls on Instagram and have become a body positivity advocate. How can parents ensure their children are comfortable in their own skin, no matter what?
Inclusivity is a word that I started using with Hans when he was just four or five. I explained to him that there are different people. And if he came across anybody that was special, he needs to make them feel even more special. Inclusivity and body positivity go hand in hand. When you are raising your child to be a child of the world, you have to prepare them. We already have years of discrimination based on skin colour and god knows what all behind us. We have to undo it in our generation.
How do you get your kids to listen?
I appreciate them a lot. I don’t clap and say “great job” but I say: “Nyra, I appreciate that you put your toys back.” It is just a conversation which is very subtle, but it encourages them to do the task. After they do it, I thank them and maybe even give them a high-five. When they feel like they did something grown up, they want to do it again. This kind of positive reinforcement totally works but not in a way where you are constantly commenting and annoying the child.
Does your husband just ‘help out’ with the kids or does he actually share the load?
My husband (Akshai Varde) is on another level. He taught me how to put a diaper on Hans and he was the swaddle king. Besides breastfeeding, he was on for it all. When he is back from work, he takes over. He has done that from day one without making it look like he’s doing me a favour. We are a team. I know, it is rare. It comes with conversation. It comes with asking for help. It also comes with the man who is willing. I think when we glamorise men ‘helping out’, it is a start for them to realize that they should be doing it without it being looked upon as something special.
You share a close bond with your mom-in-law a.k.a Sassy Saasu. Do you two ever have parenting-related clashes?
I got lucky. I have a mother-in-law who’s really cool and a lot of fun. She supports but does not interfere. Like if she sees me grinding almonds and putting it into the kids’ porridge, she may suggest something. But if I say ‘no, I prefer it this way,’ she respects that. I appreciate this. I know it is not the case in most houses.
Do Hans and Nyra know they are social media stars?
They have never seen themselves on social media. I barely use my mobile when I am around them, and no one at home is supposed to show them the phone. We live a very protected life in Goa, literally away from the buzz. My kids go to a regular school. Sometimes, when people come up to them, they are surprised. Hans says, “Look mamma, that lady is smiling at me.” They just feel that a lot of people care for them (smiles). When people approach us in public places, I politely ask them not to mention any reels. There can be a lot of pressure on social media. You can’t let that reach your kids, and it’s worked for me till now. Even when I shoot videos with the kids, it is all very spontaneous and fun. I never say ‘beta, naach’. If we feel like dancing, we dance and I record it. We do it out of joy and masti, not because of any compulsion. We get a lot of advertisement offers too. But I don’t do all of them and I always give the kids a choice. Recently, Hans shot a lollipop commercial with me because he loves that lollipop.
A lot of people were on Instagram to see sexy Sam. But she was not there-Sameera Reddy
7:53 AM
As she stumbles upon a new-found audience in Instagram’s fitness aficionados, Sameera Reddy on disappointing those who follow her for glamorous posts, and addressing those who need real talk
Sonia Lulla (MID-DAY; January 12, 2022)
At a time when actors like Malaika Arora and Soha Ali Khan are redefining what 40s can look like for athletically superior mothers, a crucial conversation is also gaining attention on Sameera Reddy’s Instagram page. Addressing her 1.5 million followers, Reddy talks of the guilt she endured when she didn’t fit a certain body type, post pregnancy.
The truth of the troubled relationships that young actors in cinema have had with their bodies are well known. For Reddy, matters were not quite at odds with the ‘norm’. “I would run, swim, lift, and exercise even if I was exhausted after a long day of shoot. Mentally, I was volatile. Fad dieting was a norm. I’d survive on [minimal food], and black coffee, and had cut out sugar and carbs from my diet. When you are young, you tend to do whatever you need to do to get the job done.”
Although her lifestyle contributed to the onset of thyroid, Reddy had her real moment of realisation post-partum, when the only fruits of her labour in the gym was deteriorating mental health. “I had gained 32 kilos and tried everything I possibly could. I’d always end up demotivated. That’s when I knew I had to redefine my goals and shut off. It was like cracking something into pieces, and putting it back together.”
Her parameter to gauge if a routine was working in her favour or not, was simple — If she struggled to stick to it, it wasn’t for her. “I’d run and do busts of exercises and expect my body to react positively, but the frustration would make me give up. But, if I felt calm, I could stick to the plan. It’s not possible to depend on morale and keep at it. Consistency can be built with a calm mind.”
Husband Akshai Varde encouraged her to make her approach enjoyable, and introduced her to sports. Today, her mornings begin with a session of yoga, and evenings are spent with her kids indulging in a game badminton. “My curves have become noticeable again after taking to power yoga, and walking always works well for me. Boxing has been incredible too. But I do intend to return to lifting, again.”
In an industry that thrives on airbrushed images, Reddy found the process of putting her struggles on a podium fascinatingly liberating. “The more I’d speak, the more free I’d feel.” An image of her showcasing her grey hair was the trigger that kicked off a “cleansing process” of her feed.
“A lot of people were there to see sexy Sam. But she was not there. They were shocked to see the images I was sharing, and began to drop off.” But as she stayed consistent, she found a league of women who felt she spoke directly to them, and addressed their struggles. “They found in this platform a safe space. It was interesting for me to meet the right audience.”
Reddy’s love for performance, editing, and shooting could be put to work. As the one-woman army handling the show behind her social media page, she learns several lessons each day. “A million came and went. But I can finally speak to the right people. Those who hope that a plan that worked for them a decade ago, will do so again, will eventually be frustrated. You need to redefine goals as you age.”
Reddy’s top five tips
1. Practice mindful eating, and keep a diary.
2. Yoga, for me, was life-altering.
3. Do not eat after 7 pm. A simple trick that works for me is brushing my teeth after 7 pm. That is a trigger to stop eating.
4. I have reaped umpteen benefits from intermittent fasting.
5. Practice a sport that you enjoy, and keep changing your workouts.
I put on 35 kgs while I saw other actors who bounced right back after child birth-Sameera Reddy
8:31 AM
Ahead of releasing her book on the subject, actor Sameera Reddy talks about the unrealistic standards that women are expected to conform to and the toll it takes on them mentally and physically
Anjana Vaswani (MUMBAI MIRROR; January 4, 2021)
Sameera Reddy was just 19 when she made her first appearance on film. It was in a video of a Pankaj Udhas ghazal. And, dressed in a simple outfit, her frizz-free dark hair cascading down her back as she etches out a rangoli pattern on the floor, Reddy looked dropdead gorgeous, effortlessly so. “Ahista kijiye baatein (“Speak softly”),” Udhas sings in the video. Now, some 22 years later, Reddy’s poised to do the exact opposite. For over a year, she’s been using her social media streams to raise her voice about the pressure to look perfect that women of all ages and in all careers experience; and this year, she’ll be releasing a book on the subject, titled, “Imperfectly Perfect” (Westland Books).
In the forthcoming title, Reddy – whose sisters Meghna and Sushama are also in the entertainment business, having started their careers as models – takes readers through her journey. She talks about life as an insecure teenager, as a model and actor struggling with eating disorders, and then as a new mum coping with post-partum depression and weight gain. “Today, my aim every day is just to be happy,” says Reddy, who hopes her book will guide readers to the sanguine headspace, “where one can be kind to oneself, and one is ready to feel happiness”.
It has taken her a while to get here, and the journey hasn’t been easy. A little over a decade and a half after she made heads turn in that Pankaj Udhas video, Reddy, who had been a successful model and actor and was now mother to a baby boy, found herself grappling with body image issues, and more, she recalls. “Every time I checked social media, the people around me seemed to be living these amazing, perfect, filtered lives and I felt I didn’t have the strength or the courage to be myself,” Reddy recalls. “After the birth of my first child, I broke,” she says, “I just could not live up to expectations”.
Right from the day she heard she was expecting, Reddy had gone by the book – by several, in fact, to prepare for the big day. “I had this picture-perfect idea of marriage and childbirth and pregnancy. I had read the books and was prepared with the hospital bag, and had checked all the must-haves off all the lists, but no one prepares you for the hormonal ups and downs, and the depression that can follow.”
Even the unwavering support of an understanding spouse did little to counter the downer. “I put on 35 kgs and neighbours and people around me would say ‘What happened to you? It’s been a year since you’ve given birth and you’re still so big’. I saw other actors who bounced right back after child birth.” The constant comparisons triggered the deep-seeded body image issues Reddy had already been grappling with for most of her life.
“I felt I had failed,” she says, looking back. The absence of role models who presented a more realistic image of life after childbirth didn’t help. Thankfully, in recent years, celebrities like Soha Ali Khan and Mandira Bedi have also talking candidly about their experiences with the baby blues and postpartum depression, so the future generation of women have healthier, more natural, role models to look to.
This is vital, because, in fact, an estimated 60 to 80 per cent of new mothers experience this. Hormonal changes can cause mild anxiety in some, but in others, the chemical imbalance coupled with the sheer exhaustion of the early days of motherhood can bring on a deep, dark sadness. For most, it lasts for about a week or two after delivery, but left untreated, the condition could sustain for years, too. To make matters worse, the chemical imbalance is often compounded by feelings of low self-esteem when you’re not happy about the way you look and – this one’s often brushed under the rug – disappointment, because you just don’t feel that gush of love or joy that women are expected to after childbirth. Conditioned to believe it’s the happiest experience of one’s life, women who don’t feel that way, tend to assume something must be wrong with them. Often, they, like Reddy, feel they’ve ‘failed’.
In hindsight, Reddy says, “We put so much emphasis on success and failure but really who defines that?”
But Reddy also wants to emphasize that it’s not just new mums who feel this pressure to look, feel and act a certain way. A 2018 study on eating disorders in South India, conducted by N Nivedita, G Sreenivasa, T S Sathyanarayana Rao and S Suttur Malini, showed that over 26 per cent of participants suffered from some sort of ED. Readers would have been recently reminded of Princess Diana’s struggle with Bulimia Nervosa by the new season of a popular TV show. It’s a cycle of bingeing and purging, believed to be commonly triggered by societal and cultural stress, peer pressure, body image issues and poor self-esteem. It wouldn’t surprise Reddy to learn that women have been seen to be nine times more likely to suffer from Bulimia Nervosa than men.
“Environmental conditioning starts weighing down on women very early. Most teens feel this need to adhere,” she says, adding that this is in fact what drove her to speak out in the first place. “We need to break these patterns, and we can only do that if we do it together, as a society.”
It took two whole years of work – therapy, introspection, yoga and homeopathy – before Reddy could arrive at this place, one from where she would inspire and lead others into this journey of self-love. “When you break apart, you can put yourself together in the most liberating way,” Reddy says, “and it’s exhilarating to be where I am today.”
Manjri Varde & I wanted to change the old school narrative of what a bahu and saas should be like-Sameera Reddy
8:32 AM
Trashing the stereotypical trope of a conflict-ridden relationship, actor Sameera Reddy and her mom-in-law, Manjri Varde, make viral videos of quick food tips, full of banter
Aastha Atray Banan (MID-DAY; October 25, 2020)
Actor, and now, digital creator, Sameera Reddy, is a delight on social media. The 41-year-old's unfiltered pictures and videos find a connect with the everyday woman—who deals with her kids, greying hair, and, of course, her mother-in-law. But the actor, whom we remember from movies such as Race and Musafir, and as part of stylish trio of sisters — VJ Meghna and model Sushma — is setting family goals for her 956k followers of Instagram. Since March 2020, Reddy and her mother-in-law, Manjri Varde, have been making food and fashion content under the title, Messy Mama and Sassy Saasu.
As we sit down for a Zoom chat, the two — Reddy and Varde, along with the rest of the family, moved to Goa during the Coronavirus lockdown — are in a happy, upbeat mood. It's Varde's first interview, and though she says she is nervous, she looks far from it. "I have asked her [to join me] for so many interviews, but she has turned it down. She said yes only because she loves mid-day," says Reddy.
Ask them if they have always shared this camaraderie, and Varde says, "She is more exuberant, and I am quieter. But, in the beginning, it was good because I accept things very easily. She had come into our lives and that was it. She would talk, and do things, and she always acted like it was her house. Once, she told me 'I like this shampoo in your bathroom. I am taking it home.' This was before she got married to Akshai," she says.
Reddy laughs and says, "When I met Akshai, I knew he was the man I wanted to marry. But I wasn't the type to put my best foot forward and try and please my would-be mother in-law. I wanted the relationship to be clear from the beginning. I annoyed her, irritated her—she would be aghast and would say 'You are going to say this to me?' I was like 'Ya!' Communication is key. I can't brush things under the carpet. Take the band-aid off. That's why we have a cool relationship today because she responded to that idea."
It could be the reason that Reddy, who married entrepreneur Akshai Varde seven years ago, fit into the household without glitches. "She is larger! I am only five feet. So, physically and in her attitude, she was larger. She is a free person. But, I realised soon that she doesn't have any malice, and won't do anything in an underhanded way. That's why I accept all the rest," says Varde, and Reddy adds, "Now, she tells me off pretty often." And that sets them off laughing.
The chemistry has translated well on social media, with their videos going viral. If one shows them making a homestyle frankie, another has them exploring their weekend style, often wearing the same type of garment. They make fun of each other, but the videos show genuine mutual affection. "It started off with Manjri making fun of the way I cut onions. We have a banter that's real. She would say 'didn't your mother teach you anything' and I would say 'OMG, I love what you are wearing. I wouldn't wear that'. She likes loud colours and it takes a personality to wear any of what she wears. She has 12 pairs of boots! But we don't feel bad about anything we say. We wanted to change the old-school narrative of what a bahu and saas should be like. I don't even call her mom," says Reddy, and Varde adds, "She still calls me aunty!" Varde also has adapted to the social media platform effortlessly, "I like it. I don't have to leave the house to do anything!"
They are now headed to greener pastures, having shot their first advertisement together, this month. "Manjri is a natural. Even the director of the ad said she is amazing. She delivers all the lines perfectly. When I am directing her in the videos, I don't even see her as my MIL. I see her as the 'talent'." Right now, they just want to keep creating content—"We wanted people her age thinking, 'I can still sass it up'. We want people to see the saas-bahu relationship in a positive way. We just go with the flow. Everything you see is very real, and that's what makes it fun."
I carry the baby and my son dances around me-Sameera Reddy
8:35 AM
As told to Akash Bhatnagar (MUMBAI MIRROR; April 17, 2020)
It’s a little frustrating because my four-year-old son, Hans, needs to expend all that boy energy and my nine-month-old daughter, Nyra is just crawling. So, I decided on a common activity—dancing. I carry the baby in my arms and my son dances around me. We all need to let loose at a time like this, give space even to the kids. That’s why I let Hans paint even if it means I have to clean the marble floors for two hours afterwards.
My husband (Akshai Varde) makes breakfast before he starts working his regular hours, during which Hans sits and studies next to him on the apps he has downloaded. My mother-in-law and I make elaborate meals, then, get creative with leftovers. I’ve become thrifty with supplies too, using diapers only for the nights. Since I don’t have size-appropriate summer clothes for Nyra, I’ve cut off the sleeves from her tees to make sleeveless tops.
Hans has been worrying about his birthday which is approaching next month. I’ve explained to him that we can do everything but at home. He wants to meet his grandparents who live two blocks away but I can’t put him or my parents at risk. Once the Coronavirus lockdown is lifted, we’ll go running.
Back then, I didn’t even realise I was suffering post partum depression-Sameera Reddy
7:55 AM
Kavita Awaasthi (HINDUSTAN TIMES; November 27, 2019)
During her second pregnancy and post her delivery, actor Sameera Reddy was quite vocal about her experiences. She also urged women, especially new mothers to love themselves, for the way they are.
Sameera even started a campaign, #Imperfectly Perfect, on social media and continues to build on it. Talking about it, she reveals, “My campaign comes from the fact that I felt completely disillusioned and broken after my first pregnancy when I gained weight and was 105 kg. The perfect body and the perfect face that I worked on, for my film career, broke down and I was completely lost.” She points out that she couldn’t understand why people were judging her so much.
Sameera adds, “I also realised the importance of self-acceptance and really loving yourself which is lacking in today’s day and age. Moreover, social media has made this anxiety worse. My campaign aims at combating this feeling and creating awareness that everything may look picture perfect on social media, but it isn’t necessarily true. Internal happiness matters the most.” Post the birth of her second child, daughter Nyra, Sameera’s life has been “extremely hectic”. She points out that she was “more prepared” this time as she also has a four-year-old son, Hans.
Many new mothers suffer from postpartum depression and Sameera, too, experienced it after her first pregnancy. “Back then, I didn’t even realise I was suffering post-partum. When I complained that I was emotional, moody and feeling very disconnected, I was told that they were the pregnancy blues. I kept thinking something is wrong with me. But later, when I consulted a doctor about my negative thoughts and how I was often feeling low, I was told that I had postpartum depression. As I waited too long to get a diagnosis, it took me almost a year to get out of it. Now, I want to help new mothers realise when and if they slip into it. It’s nothing to be ashamed of,” she says.
I spent 9 months making this child, I’m not going to be scared now-Sameera Reddy
7:05 AM
After battling postpartum depression with first pregnancy, Sameera Reddy is scaling mountains with her second child
Akash Bhatnagar (MUMBAI MIRROR; October 3, 2019)
From an underwater photoshoot to 6300 feet above water level, Sameera Reddy has already taken her two-and-a-half-month-old daughter places. Last Wednesday, the actress, with husband Akshai Varde and kids, Hans and Nyra, travelled to Karnataka just months after delivering her daughter on July 12. In comfy pajamas, with little Nyra strapped to her front, she climbed Mullayanagiri and shared their journey with the world.Back in the Bay, she is flushed with pride and recounts that the adventure started with a nature walk in the coffee plantations of Chikmagalur. “It was an educational trip for four-and-a-half year-old Hans. We also went on a safari in Bhadra reserve so that he could see animals like tigers and peacocks, two of which he spotted right in front of the door. It was a special moment for him. Then, we went hiking and I decided to scale Karnataka’s highest peak. It’s something I was really excited about,” she beams, confiding that after Hans was born, she had suffered from postpartum depression and sat at home for a year, refusing to step out. “I was confused, feeling low and crying all the time. Maybe it was the baby blues and I did not want to go down that road again. That’s why I have been up and about since the first day of this pregnancy. I was shooting till a day prior to Nyra’s birth.”
And just how difficult was it travelling with a two-month old baby? Sameera insists it was smooth sailing. “My Nyra is an explorer, she was wide awake all the way, checking out everything. Not once did she cry and later she slept really well,” she shares, adding that this time motherhood has made her fearless and debunking all the usual myths, she’s started feeling good from within. “I spent nine months making this beautiful child, I’m not going to be sitting at home being scared now.”
She insists that there’s a bigger purpose in Nyra’s birth which is to tell all new mothers to not worry about their weight but to let go of all their fears and inhibitions, just go out there and have fun.
“My husband now tells me that I have become a new person,” she jokes, admitting that many women have been messaging her that she’s inspired them to embrace motherhood.
Sameera also supports breastfeeding and refuses to be cooped up with her baby within the four walls of her home. “I’ve fed Nyra in the backseat of a car and on the top of a mountain. I should not feel ashamed about feeding my own child,” she reasons.
She has a role model in Kareena Kapoor who’s worked all through her pregnancy and after, doing things her way without listening to anyone. “She is such a hands-on loving mother and I respect her for breaking the myth that motherhood requires you to change your attitude with respect to your career,” she applauds, then, surprises you by telling you that Bollywood is a fake world of social media friendships and glittering parties. “I’ve never been a part of it because I like to be real. I’m sure they wouldn’t like me for doing this.”
Sameera herself has always been adventurous. She went backpacking around Thailand for a month when she was 18. Are any more trips on the cards? “We’ll do one every two months. The next one is to Kerala. I’ll go out and make travel stories with my kids and educate mothers on how to do it,” she signs off with a smile.
I asked myself, will Karan Johar like me?-Sameera Reddy
8:41 AM
Pregnant for the second time, actress Sameera Reddy gets candid about the time she was 102 kg, refusing to leave her couch, and worried about 'fitting in'
Aastha Atray Banan (MID-DAY; May 5, 2019)
Last week, actress Sameera Reddy, only two months old on the social media platform, put up an Instagram post that has since gone viral. It shows her in her June 2015 avatar, at 102 kg, and then compares it to a picture from last month, where she is down to 80 kg and second-time pregnant. "That post, and the love it got, has given me the courage to do this interview," says the actress, who shot to fame in 1998, with Pankaj Udhas' video for the song Aahista Kijiye Baatein.
She then did movies like Maine Dil Tujhko Diya and Race. Five years ago, she got married to entrepreneur Akshai Varde, and had her first child, son Hans, in 2015. "I got on Instagram and decided that the first thing I will be is honest. I will be fat if I have to be, and use no filters. I feel bad for all the people, including me, feeling FOMO at other people's lives where it's all cool parties and pina coladas on the beach. I want to call that out and say 'that's bull****'."
She may sound like a voice of reason, but Reddy says it has taken her a while to get here, and it's been hell. When we meet her at her home, she is glowing and doesn't mince her words as she chats with us. For a year post her son being born, she didn't let her family take pictures of her as she was 102 kg. The picture on Instagram is the one surviving picture from that time. Pre-pregnancy, she got prolactinoma - high levels of prolactin - that makes it harder to have babies, which led to her popping pills. Post getting pregnant, she got placenta previa - when a baby's placenta partially or totally covers the mother's cervix. "My weight had always been 70 to 75 kg, as I am Reddy girl, tall with heavy bones. Imagine my shock, when during my first pregnancy, I became 102 kg, which didn't even come off once I had the baby." It was a time of anxiety, and fear. "I went through a really dark place. Especially once the comments started coming in. People would come home and ask me, 'arrey aap ko kya ho gaya'. I took Hans in a pram to Joggers Park, and that was the first and last time I went in that year. Random people came up to me and said, 'oh you are Sameera Reddy, we can't recognise you. This house became my fortress."
For the ambitious and upbeat working girl, who was making all the right moves in her career at the time, the world was suddenly a bleak place. Reddy recalls struggling to keep her weight down during her career, and blames the constant dieting and working out for the problems she faced during her first pregnancy. But it's the mental demons that were the real challenge.
"I had thought I would be the glamorous mother, and come back in the limelight. My whole vision went for a toss. I bought into the yummy mummy dream - the glamorous Instagram mommy. I was just a career girl who caved to the into the pressures of keeping up the image." The final straw was when she got alopecia areata, an auto-immune disease that led to her hair falling in clumps. "I had a meltdown. I turned to homeopathy and counselling, I had to talk to someone. I had gone from being an actress receiving all this adulation to having no self worth. I realised how superficial I had been to begin with. I had been in such a vicious cycle - eating lesser, running, thinking of this bag, that stylist, asking questions like 'am I on the best dressed list?'; 'Am I invited to this party?', 'Does Karan Johar like me?'. I wanted to be with the IT crowd, and I was there, schmoozing, and then I just cut off."
But once the switch turned, thanks to yoga, pilates, and the support of her family, Reddy started feeling like herself again - actually, a better version. "I can look at this objectively now, and, it's superb. I was an empty shell, which could be knocked down if something happened, and this whole experience has helped me reinvent myself. I am not because you think am great, I am because I am and I am awesome." As she gets into the seventh month of her pregnancy, she says she isn't worried that it all may happen again. The past has prepared her well for the future. "My husband asked me if I really wanted to do this again. I told him 'I am fearless today'. I have owned this pregnancy, enjoyed it. I have taken no injections, and I do yoga. I have also tackled my own fears, which makes me come from a place where I am extremely bold. It's all going to be ok."
It upsets me to see people fat shame a woman who has just delivered a baby-Sameera Reddy
8:24 AM
Rachana Dubey (BOMBAY TIMES; February 11, 2019)A few days ago, her social media post with her baby bump brought her right back in the headlines. Between 2002 and 2013, Sameera Reddy had made a splash on the big screen with her impressive dance moves, glam image and a fit bod. The actress, who has been part of films like Musafir (2004) and Race (2008), stepped out of the spotlight soon after she got married in 2014. Not one to share every minute of her personal life on social media, she has been relishing her time away from public glare. Now, she lives in a cosy home, tucked in the bylanes of Bandra, and is a hands-on mommy to her three-year-old son, Hans. Over to Sameera, who is expecting her second child and is eager to make a comeback in the movies in the near future. Excerpts:
Your post on a photo-sharing site announced your second pregnancy. You’ve preferred to stay away from the public eye ever since you got married. How do you feel about this drastic change from being a celebrity to being off the grid, completely?
I’m enjoying it. Right after I got married, I had a tough pregnancy and that made me go into a shell. My insecurities became too big and I grew quiet. I stopped stepping out, because I feared that people will judge me. It became stressful to be in the public eye at that time. One part of my heart wanted to come back to the movies right after Hans was born, but the other part didn’t want to. In fact, gradually, I started enjoying my time away from the spotlight. I started leading a normal life. This time around, the pregnancy has been a lot easier on me. It’s joyous and I feel sexy about myself. I am so happy to be out there. This should be the way to deal with such a beautiful phase of your life. That’s why I decided to step out and flaunt my bump.
Kareena Kapoor Khan was the trendsetter in this regard. She flaunted her pregnancy, worked throughout and chose to bounce back immediately after child birth. Even Neha Dhupia did that...
The difference is that people are more accepting of these things now. Kareena and Neha have stepped out and done whatever they wanted to do when they were carrying their babies and people appreciated it. Now, even weight gain due to pregnancy is being accepted and presented beautifully. Of course, there are people who don’t miss a chance to fat-shame a woman, but more power to all the women who step out in style. Today, even pregnant women are considered to be sexy.
The mindset has gradually changed in recent times, but do you think during your first pregnancy, you were nervous and conscious because of the general perception people have about women in showbiz going the family way and to top it, the fear of facing body shame?
Yeah! I was all nerves when I was having my first baby. I was freshly out of show business, but I was still caught up being who I had been for so many years. I felt major FOMO (fear of missing out). The thought that people will judge me for the way I look, refused to leave my mind when I was pregnant and even after I delivered. Now, when I look back, I think I was being silly. This is the industry I chose and it is human nature to judge. Yes, it was my first brush with the experience of being a mother and going through so many changes in my body. I couldn’t cater to the image of being an actress. Maybe, I was not fully prepared to be a mother, but it feels good to see how things have changed now.
Recently, Neha Dhupia was fat-shamed on social media and she retaliated to shut the trolls up. Looking back, do you think that you, too, should have spoken out?
It upsets me to see people fat-shame a woman who has just delivered a baby. It’s in bad taste. Everyone’s mother has been through the same drill. This needs to change right away. I went quiet after my first pregnancy, because of these reasons. I suffered post-partum depression because my physical appearance went through such a change. I had this imaginary gun to my head that actresses are supposed to bounce back and look a certain way. My body didn’t allow me to do that. The harder I tried, the tougher it got. It was supposed to be the most joyous period of my life and I was battling this emotional upheaval. I was torn between loving my son and feeling lost as a woman, who was completely out of shape. It’s a mistake to have not spoken out at that time. It’s brave on Neha’s part to speak her mind and shut people up. The time that a woman takes to regain fitness after childbirth is her business alone.
The second time around, you must be better prepared and it is probably a smoother ride...
Oh, it’s unbelievably exciting. I feel so comfortable dressing up this time around. My confidence is back. My son has conversations with the baby bump. I am at peace with myself. Also, I have had a long break from films, so I am out of the bubble that I once lived in.
Do you miss being in front of the camera?
It was a conscious decision to turn down work when I got married, because I can’t be in and out of two things. I am either in or completely out. I’m amazed to see so many working mothers around me, who balance work and babies so well. For me, Raveena Tandon is a great inspiration. I actually used to be around Raveena a lot when she had her two babies. I loved how she stepped away from everything and returned to work only when she was ready for it. To a degree, even Kajol has done that. It resonated with me, because I can’t do both things; I didn’t have the strength of a working mother. Now, when I come back to work, I will be in it completely. Yes, it won’t happen immediately. It will take about two years, but I will come back. There are so many different avenues today, that actresses will never be short of options. For now, I just want to start stepping out. I want to come across as what I am — a normal woman who makes mistakes like everyone else. The difference is that I was an air-head when I was in my elements those days. I used to have someone doing everything for me. Today, I feel more in control. I can run my life and family without any frills. I was a weak person before, but today, I am more aware and independent. For instance, I don’t have a battery of nannies to run after my baby. I do it myself. It’s a great feeling to be empowered.
Was it ever a huge dilemma to leave film sets for playschools?
It’s the best therapy in the world. My skin is clear without any creams and I get sound sleep. Sometimes, I wonder about the kind of pressure I took upon myself back then. My husband is still shocked about my switch. All the pressure and anxiety vanished when I decided to choose motherhood over films. I owed no one an answer. If I come back now, it will be on my terms, take it or leave it.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)