In Pagglait, director Umesh Bist has chosen an unusual premise for his protagonist’s journey of self-discovery. Sandhya, essayed by Sanya Malhotra, comes into her own after the untimely demise of her young husband. As she sank her teeth into the role, Malhotra says she identified with the character’s vulnerabilities and frailties.

“I realised I was a lot like Sandhya. She was looking for external validation, something that I did too. I was judgmental and critical of myself. I used to not like any of my work, and would never like to see myself on screen. But 2020 was a year of retrospection, and that’s when I realised that I was being too harsh on myself. When I watched Pagglait, I told myself, ‘You have done a good job,’” says the actor.

She adds that her character’s confusion reminded her of her college days. “I wanted to be an actor, but I never told anyone about my aspirations. I kept the secret to myself because I felt nobody would understand me,” says Malhotra, glad that she took the leap of faith and moved to Mumbai to pursue her dream.

The film, also starring Sayani Gupta, Ashutosh Rana and Raghubir Yadav, drops on Netflix today. It’s a hat-trick for the actor whose last two films, Shakuntala Devi (2020) and Ludo (2020), had digital premieres. “We survived 2020 because of the entertainment provided by OTT platforms. Theatrical releases have a different charm, but [a digital outing] is no longer a compromised release.”