Kashmera Shah and Krushna Abhishek recount their struggle to become parents, and for the first time, share pics of their twin boys — Rayaan and Krishaang — with BT
Neha Maheshwri (BOMBAY TIMES; May 7, 2018)

The road to parenthood was not easy for Kashmera Shah and Krushna Abhishek. But three years of struggle feels like nothing when one sees their be aming faces every time they talk about their twins Rayaan and Krishaang. The couple secretly tied the knot in 2012, but didn’t want a child immediately since they were focussed on their careers. However, all attempts to conceive naturally failed when they started planning for a child in late 2014. Finally, they opted for In-Vitro Fertilisation (IVF). Says Kashmera, “Everything was fine with us, but we lead such stressful lives that it often becomes a matter of luck. When Krushna’s dad fell ill, we put the plan on hold for six months. It was a difficult time for us. I went through five (ovum) pick-ups and three (embryo) transfers, but all in vain.”

The actress adds, “In a span of 10 days, I went from size two to eight. I didn’t give it a break and kept trying every month, thereby pumping myself with injections, as I didn’t have the time or luxury to wait. After all, I was not in my 20s anymore. Also, it’s a little dangerous to have a kid when you are older. It took us 13 attempts and two years of constant pain and no work to have our babies. Some people have to go through the struggle and maybe, God wanted to test us.”

The couple even toyed with the idea of adoption. “It’s harmful to torture your body beyond a point,” says the actress, adding, “It was not easy to look pregnant and not be pregnant, as these injections tend to make you bloated. We then decided that if everything failed, we would adopt a girl child.”

But when their doctor as well as Krushna’s cousins Vinay and Rishaab suggested surrogacy, the couple decided to give it a thought. “My doctor called to tell me to decide about the next move as there were chances of a ban on surrogacy in India. So, we signed the papers and it happened,” reveals Kashmera. “When an actress opts for surrogacy, people think that we are figure-conscious. But that’s not true. I know how hard it was for me. I empathise with women who are in this profession, as you don’t tend to marry or have kids early usually,” she adds.

Krushna finds a connection between his father and his sons as he recalls how much his father, who was suffering from cancer, wished to see his grandchild. “Coincidentally, four days before he passed away, my father told me that he would return to us as my son. The twins were conceived on the 14th day of his demise. Krishaang reminds me of my dad because he is always smiling.”

However, their anguish was far from over, as the elder twin (Rayaan) fought for his life in the hospital for six weeks. Thus, the couple delayed the announcement of their kids’ arrival. They were extremely anxious and cautious and would check on him every five minutes to make sure he was breathing normally. “The first month was tough. We had no support from the family, barring Ragini’s (cousin Ragini Khanna) mother and my sister Arti (Singh),” says Krushna.

The couple do not believe in making a fuss over their children and want to give them a normal childhood, like the way they themselves were brought up. However, they do believe that the kids need to get used to one parent being around them. “I am not a helicopter mother. I don’t want to bring them up as spoilt, pampered kids. We don’t want them to take our status for granted. They will have their own struggles. I just want to teach them to be good to women, which is a huge responsibility, especially when you are parents to boys in current times,” says Kashmera.

The conversation ends on a high note, with the kids jiggling as their mom sings Lag Di Punjaban Lag Di Patola to them. “That’s their favourite song. Ek gaayak hai aur ek naayak hai,” quips the proud mommy.