Birthday girl Aishwarya Rai Bachchan on life, love, family and work
Upala KBR (DNA; November 1, 2015)


On kitchen matters
“After marriage, I remember people were keen to know how much time I spent in the kitchen. I remember after bau-bhaat, when you come to your in-laws’ home for the grihapravesh, I made halwa. Once in a while, I used to make bhindi or parathas. But the truth is, in our home, we are not in the kitchen all the time cooking. I did spend time in the kitchen more after Aaradhya was born, though — from the time that she started having solids, I was looking into all different foods, slowly and gradually introducing food tastes to her. You learn about nutrition, the combinations you can work out in terms of carbs, proteins and vegetables and create your own little recipes. Now, she eats what we eat, just a lot less spicier. Luckily, she was very easy with food, with a bit of work on our part. I have seen to it that I’ve introduced everything to her in different ways.”

Hands-on mom
“I don’t think it’s fair to compare or gloat about that. I am the mother that I want to be and I keep saying this — being a working mother is immensely challenging because any parent, especially those who have to go to work early in the morning, cannot see their kids for hours. It’s not easy. Nobody wants to leave their kid and go work.

I do admit that if the nature of my job allows for me to be able to have my child along, not feel the lack of my presence, then I am going to make the effort to accomplish that. And at the same time, give her a very normal childhood and be a very normal mother to her daughter. I do refer to my filming locations as an ‘office’ because I want Aaradhya to understand that I am a working mother who goes to office. ‘Shooting’ is a very strange term to her. Honestly, though, I never thought about it before marriage. Now I think shooting is a really weird term. I’ve become conscious of the words I use around her, how she would interpret them. Like a shot is being taken, but why would you say that to a kid and so on. She is familiar with the visual medium but I have never allowed her to get hooked on to it.”

My best roles: Miss World, actress, wife and mother
“Each one has been a learning phase because they were all overnight transitions in my life. The night before Miss World, I was a regular student and overnight, I was given this crown. My life changed. I wanted to represent my country, but then one takes on the responsibility as well. You don’t just want to be a beauty queen, but also a woman of substance. You need to learn things almost overnight and then one comes into films...Taking it up as a profession was tough for me because I was academically-oriented and working towards a degree. So if I wanted to take up acting as my career, I’d have to do that with confidence. You realise how quickly things change. It was changing at a certain pace for female leads and then suddenly you try to behave as if it’s already changed and are trying to bring that attitude in here. Marriage? Wow! Suddenly overnight, we went from being dearest of friends to looking at being a couple and starting a family together — you know how quickly that happened — and there was so much going on with me shooting for a period film (Jodhaa Akbar). At that phase, you automatically realise it’s all about your upbringing, your family, the values that you have always cherished. Bringing about that balance on another realm was important to me. But of course, the absolutely unknown, most beautiful and blessed learning phase has been motherhood! I am eternally grateful to God and Aaradhya that I had and am continuing to have this incredible challenge. I say this often and sometimes, people feel I’m being flowery, but it’s true. Motherhood is the most beautiful fatigue. It’s relaxing. It’s invigorating. Even if you are tired, you would rather spend that time with your child. You will never hear me complain ing about the loss of sleep. I have done it all on my own. I kept just one girl with me. I will let her eat and sleep and I will do everything. I have never kept a posse of maids and nannies. Even if it’s hard work, it’s my choice. I am not remotely complaining nor judging. These are the choices I have made and that’s the life I have been leading.”

All About Abhi
“He’s a friend, companion, husband and a father, but I think the fact that he’s my best friend pretty much encapsulates it all. We are a very normal couple. Abhishek and I sometimes joke about being second siblings. We both share and talk a lot about what we are feeling. Sometimes, we have so much to say that we want to be the first to share it. While we are both good listeners we are also extremely talkative.”