Citing grey roles like Ledger's Joker and Brando's Godfather, Neelima defends son Shahid Kapoor's Kabir Singh that is drawing flak for glorifying misogyny
Upala KBR (MID-DAY; June 28, 2019)

Its box-office numbers may tell a different story, but Shahid Kapoor's Kabir Singh has reignited the discussion of how cinema needs to be more responsible in its storytelling. The Shahid Kapoor starrer has been criticised by several critics and audiences alike for glorifying toxic masculinity. Coming to her son's defense, mother Neelima Azim says that the Sandeep Reddy Vanga film is "an intelligent remake".

"Actors have the freedom to play morally controversial characters because they make for meaty roles. Tomorrow, if you play a psychopathic serial killer, will everybody watching the movie become one? Dilip [Kumar] saab and Rajesh Khanna played grey roles in Amar and Red Rose. Are you suggesting that every grey role be scrapped? In Hollywood, actors have won Oscars for characters like these. If we can't make such movies, then we will have to scrap films like Marlon Brando's A Streetcar Named Desire, Godfather and Heath Ledger's Joker [The Dark Knight]. One needs to understand that it is a story and not a lecture on morality."

While the audience has been welcoming grey roles, the problem with Kabir Singh lies in the treatment of its central character. Point out to her how the movie celebrates his misogynistic attitude instead of condemning it, and she argues, "It is a hard-hitting film, and shows [the protagonist's] arc — he changes from the [brash] student at the university to the one who returns home after his grandmother's demise. He suffers because of his attitude. The film is not glorifying the character. Instead, it warns you against becoming like Kabir Singh."

It is not easy to dismiss the violence shown against women. A case in point being the sequence where Kapoor's character is about to rape a woman at knifepoint. "He is about to [rape her] in the dark. As soon as the light comes on, he realises [his folly] and throws the knife away. It's symbolic in that sense," says Azim.

Shahid Kapoor’s mom Neelima Azim talks about her first grandchild, who was born last week
Upala KBR (DNA; August 29, 2016)


The young grandmother, Neelima, is thrilled about the birth of her first born’s first born. She tells us, “I have two sons (Shahid and Ishaan) with a difference of 13 years between them. I always wanted a daughter. I can’t begin to express my emotions. When I heard that Mira had delivered a little girl... it was joy multiplied. To see your first-born holding his own little first-born and just seeing him take care of our little angel made me speechless! I can’t express that beautiful feeling... Ishaan is now a chachu! The youngest in our family is now taking care of the little baby... Mira, Shahid, Ishaan and the baby — fill me with indescribable happiness. Though I would have been as happy if Mira and Shahid had a son, as I am used to being surrounded by boys. We say when a daughter is born — ghar mein bacchi aane se huzoor ki salami hui hai... Ab har tare ki barkat milegi (we have been blessed by God. Now peace, happiness and prosperity will reign).”

Neelima says when she went to the hospital to see the baby she felt their family’s golden circle was complete. “Whatever challenges that life throws at you seem little when we see the golden light...

Both my sons are doing well now personally and professionally. Ishaan will make his Bollywood debut soon. Mujhe aur kya chahiye? Bas apni dono bachchoon ki khushi. What else can I ask for? It’s the ultimate for a mother to see their kids happy and doing well. When I walked into the hospital and looked at the baby... To say that I got emotional is a small feeling. It’s a very different feeling — ek ajeeb pride aur khushi hoti hai... As adults, we go through ups and downs, but when you hold a little baby in your arms everything fades away and only a huge feeling of gratitude remains.”

Neelima reveals that she arrived at the hospital a few minutes after the baby was born. “As soon as we heard the news, we bought mithai and rushed there. But there was heavy traffic and rains so we got held up. I became very impatient as I wanted to reach fast so I kept hurrying our driver who was shocked at my behaviour. Usually, I fall asleep in the car and am much more controlled! (laughs) I wanted to give Mira and Shahid some space as a family, so I was just waiting for the call to go there. What is distance? I would have flown to another country to see my grandchild.”

About being a young grandmother, Neelima says,“It’s wonderful. In my family we do everything early. I became an actor and dancer when I was very young and had Shahid when I was just 20. So, I was a young mother as well. It’s great being a young grandmother because then you can play with the child, travel, be actively involved and grow with them and relate better to them.”

She can’t decide who Shahid’s baby looks like, “It’s difficult to say who a one-day-old baby resembles. Uska rang chadega har din, so you really can’t say whom she looks like now. All I will say is that the baby is very beautiful. Bahut pyari hai bachchi. Maa baap bhi itne pyare hain, they are made for each other and the baby is too. My son has got his unit — now he is one boy with two girls, I was one girl with two boys (smiles).”

The name of the little baby has been finalised by Mira and Shahid but Neelima says she can’t disclose her name. “There is a name for the baby but it’s the parents’ prerogative to announce it. The most interesting thing I can add here is that I thought of the same name as Shahid and Mira. Once Mira and the baby are back at home I plan to visit them as often as I can. I miss her already.”

Shahid Kapoor’s mom talks about her younger son, Ishaan, who makes his debut in Karan Johar’s film next year
Upala KBR (DNA; June 13, 2016)


A trained Kathak danseuse and an accomplished actress, Neelima will also be seen in two films shortly, says, “I can’t talk about Ishaan’s debut as the makers have their own plans of making an announcement. All I can say is that I am thrilled that my second child, too, is becoming an actor. My children are hugely blessed by God! I am so grateful to Him for taking care of both my children. They have been brought up in a great cultural mahaul — literature, music, art, music, culture, poetry and dance and are extremely hard-working and talented.”

The proud mother adds, “Ishaan like Shahid is a fabulous dancer himself. All three of us are very passionate about dancing. My children’s dancing talent developed under the influence and the blessings of my guruji Pandit Birju Maharaj, who is very close to both my sons. My mother Khadija Azim had famous poets in her family. She belongs to the family of KA Abbas. My father Anwar Azim, was a prominent journalist and Urdu author, so my children have imbibed all this culture at home.”

Neelima explains why she has stayed away from the limelight for the last few years, “I was taking care of Ishaan, who was still a child. While I was a father and mother to Shahid, I had to solely be a mother to Ishaan. Shahid was there too, with me taking care of Ishaan in so many ways. But now that Ishaan is 20 and all set to enter the film industry, I am free to work and can devote more time to my acting and dancing.”

The star’s mother Neelima Azim talks about her son becoming a father
Upala KBR (DNA; April 20, 2016)


The too-young-to-be dadi Neelima reveals, that although Shahid confirmed his impending fatherhood only now, she had sensed it earlier. Even before her laadla told her. “Of course, Shahid had told me at the right time, but I guessed it much earlier. Call it a mother’s intuition or sixth sense, but I was pretty sure Mira was expecting earlier. I was extremely happy when Shahid confirmed what I was thinking!” she recounts.

Neelima says the emotions she is going through now are indescribable. “It’s a great feeling becoming a grandmother and very difficult to express in words. We are all feeling so thrilled, excited and yet emotional... It’s a happy time for us all.”

She has two sons. Does she hope that Mira will have a daughter, so there is a baby girl in the family for her to fuss over? The to-be granny smiles, “I just want the baby to be happy, healthy and fine... Whether it’s a boy or girl doesn’t matter.”

What kind of papa will Shahid make? “He will make a wonderful one — the world’s best dad!”